Struggling

Despite the reoccurring shit show that has been my life the past couple weeks, I FINALLY managed to get some saddle time this week. Monday I rode Cool, who has officially begun his “winter spooking.” Despite him feeling really good and sound undersaddle (yay!) his brain was being stupid and he was completely convinced that the horse trailer next to the pasture WAS GOING TO KILL HIM. You know, since he walks past it every single day for turnout and it hasn’t moved since Johnny came home a week ago. Because of the nonsense (and I was riding alone) I decided that it was best not to canter and instead did some really good, forward trot work.

On Wednesday I had plans to ride Johnny around back behind the barn for a “trail ride,” but instead spent 20 minutes standing the arena (in the misting rain I might add) at the mounting block petting him and repeatedly getting on and off in an attempt to convince him that I was actually NOT planning to kill him when I got on. I’m not really sure what’s happened to him over the last two years, but based on his reactions to many simple things, I can tell you that at least some of it, wasn’t good.

Friday I saddle Cool up again for a quick hack while the baby slept. I’ve been tying to the horse trailer lately and tacking up out by the pasture since the weather has been so nice this week that the horses have spent almost all their time outside. Of course, I already had the bridle on by the time that I realized I had left Cools hoof boots in the barn. We went sans hoof boot for the first time in almost two months and I’m happy to say that he was *almost* sound. Sound enough to ride, but not 100% his usual self. We cantered a couple courses of poles and worked on moving his shoulder and the trot to free us his body movement more. He only tried to dump me off once so all in all, it was a good ride.

Today was Johnny day since my friend Dee (who was INSTRUMENTAL in Johnny, well you know, living last week) drove up to see him/work with him. As far as I’m concerned, with everything Dee has done for us the last couple weeks, Johnny is just as much hers as mine. (In fact, I made his stall name tags today since we FINALLY got a real stall put up for him. I listed her name along with mine as his owner.). We wanted to play around with saddle fit with him today and had plans to ride him a little but those quickly changed once we got him going. Poor Johnny is a basket case to ride now...I have no idea what’s happened to him but my guess is that he’s been yanked around in too strong a bit and ridden in an ill fitting saddle. His back muscle is non-existent, leaving his spine and a huge pair of shark fin withers vulnerable. I have a feeling that whatever saddle he was ridden in, it was sitting in his withers. In the end, we nixed riding him all together for the next few weeks, save for possible taking him out in the pasture to walk up and down some hills because holy loose stifles. I feel like I’m starting all over again with him...except that he’s significantly older now and phenomenally more lame. It makes me both frustrated, sad and guilty all at the same time that I’ve let so much terrible shit happen to him. Today we ended up just letting him trot around on the lunge line with the saddle on and then added a very loose pair of side reins. He’s quite lame tracking left, especially with pressure on his face. I have the massuse scheduled to come see him on the 10th of this month, and while I know it won’t magically make him better, I’m sure that it will help at least a little. I can’t bring myself to just throw up my hands and retire him...when I look at him, I see a horse that very badly wants to still have a job. It hurts my soul.

For now, he’s tucked into his stall after spending some time in Cool’s back on track hock wraps, with two grams of bute and four standing wraps. Tomorrow I’m (hopefully) having a little eq lesson on Cool with my friend Sonj.

Until next time,

Peace.Love.Ponies.