New Beginnings

Rock bottom will teach you lessons that mountain tops never will.
[Word  Porn]

Two days ago, I sat quietly in the barn, late at night, sobbing silently into the neck of my oldest, most cherished friend Emmy.

It had been a week from hell. Between lame horses, a non-stop crabbing, crying baby, and feeling like a single mother in the face of my husband working long, late hours, I'd had enough.

Yep, you read that right. I said "baby."
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Three years ago I sat down and wrote my last post regarding my barefoot journey with both Cool and Johnny. Since then, both horses have come back to fairly successful soundness. Its been a never ending journey with its fair share of ups and downs. Some days are better than others for Cool, but somehow, I do still manage to ride a little.

Two years ago Johnny moved 1.5 miles down the road to my neighbors house. She's loved and trail ridden him ever since then, but just last week, her world came crashing down a little, and there is now a very distinct possibility that Johnny will be coming back to our farm in the next several months. When/if he does, it will be for good this time. I'm never letting him leave again <3 p="">
Two years ago, my husband and I also found out that we were expecting our first child. Killian was born in June 2017 and just celebrated his first birthday a few months ago.
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Anyway, there I was, crying into the neck of thirty-one year old Emmy just like I had done so many times before in our relationship. Cool was in the stall next to her, he stuck his head over the divider wall and lipped at my hair, breathing warm muffled breaths into my ear. It was like being surrounded by the arms of my best friends. And in that moment, I suddenly thought about Johnny and I suddenly thought about this blog.

After a while, I wiped the tears away, fed my horses cookies and went back into the house. Killian was sleeping peacefully in his crib and I crept into his room, sat down in the arm chair in the corner and pulled out my phone. I found this blog on the internet and started at the beginning.

It took me two days to read the blog from start to finish. Part of me can't believe that its been almost TEN years since I first put finger tips to computer keys and began documenting my horse journey. I sat up late into the night and read about Johnny, about my college days, my horse shows and IHSA, I laughed. I cried. I cringed a couple times at my own childish stupidity.

But it was exactly what I needed. A trip down memory lane...a reconnection to my past...I'm not exactly sure, but it healed my heart in a way that I can't quiet explain.

Tonight, I put my baby to bed, went out into the barn and hugged and kissed both of my horses. This past year has been all about getting back to the simplicity of what brought me to this point in my life to begin with: my love of horses, but what I really needed, I think, was a swift kick in the pants. I needed my own words to steer me out of the darkness and back into the light.

Sometimes, life gets us down. And that's okay. The most important thing is getting back up. So here I am, picking myself back up off the ground, and looking to the sky. And part of that, is getting back to writing again. So I'm cracking my fingers, shaking off the dust, and getting back at it.

As always,

Peace.Love.Ponies.